Monday, May 27, 2019

Through Luke and Charlotte's Eyes



This morning, Carolyn and I hurried off to Luke’s 5thgrade class celebration, both a fitting acknowledgement of the students’ efforts throughout the year and a ceremonial send-off to next year’s middle school experience.  Standing beside a lavishly adorned breakfast table - from which I semi-discreetly plucked a handful of pastries, I looked up at one point to appreciate the raucous events on stage.  What I saw amazed and delighted me.  Dancing to Kool and the Gang’s “Celebration” - a perfect choice for the occasion - were roughly 50 11-year-olds, moving as one blissful wave of wiggling bodies and limbs.  Many hugged, others twirled, but all were clearly happy to be there.  Best of all, in spite of their glaring cultural differences, the palpable camaraderie that gushed from the stage evinced an incredibly unified group, one that transcended skin color and language barriers.  I suddenly realized the enormous impact this year has had on Luke and Charlotte; their world has blossomed, affording them a new perspective on life, so vast and diverse, that their outlook will never be the same.  Charlotte’s impromptu get-together a couple of months ago, at which she was the only white person out of a several 8th graders, perfectly showcased this new reality.  And to think back to a few months earlier, when she actually confessed her “uncertainty” about African Americans back home, attributing such confusion to the fact that whites and blacks generally stay apart in school.  Here in SA the opposite is true.  In an environment where less than half the students are white, with roughly 2/3 originating from other countries, blending is non-negotiable.  On the stage this morning, South Africans, Chinese, Angolans, Germans, Japanese, Americans, Dutch, French, British, and dozens more embraced as though they had grown up together.  How liberating it must be to interact with so many people, from so many backgrounds, without implicit bias and prejudice inhibiting your thoughts.  Much of what my kids had previously believed about other cultures stemmed from movies and/or social media.  But this year was the perfect remedy for that, forcing Charlotte, Luke, Carolyn, and me to examine our beliefs and to adjust our perceptions according to the very real around us.  Though not without some trepidation at the start of our year, we all quickly grew to love our new, multifaceted world.  When Charlotte and Luke return to Milton, MA, they will bring with them a heightened awareness of what human means.  Ideally, they will engage rather than stand back, pose questions rather than assume they’re right, and seek common ground rather than dismiss anyone as too different.  In the end, we all seek the same things out of life, for ourselves and our families.  None of us is better than another, merely unique, perhaps, in the ways we ensure our own survival.  By acknowledging this truth, the notion that we are only mildly different on the outside, we open our minds to unlimited possibilities.  Better yet, we become agents of a much more inclusive, accepting world, where the tendency to love is far greater than the tendency to hate.  And as I see this newfound discovery unfold in my kids’ lives, I realize that coming to South Africa, 8,000 miles away, was the smartest decision we could have made.   

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